My Own Little Sweatshop

If you're anything like me, you spend a considerable amount of time on the internet. Don't think you're the same way? You're reading a blog rather than watching tv or exercising or working, so stop fooling yourself. Anyway, my admittance of my internet addiction and the recent realization that I still have yet to become rich (seriously, WTH?) have led me to try and seek ways of making the internet work for me. Obviously, this has involved ducking many a scam in order to find something that will not make me spend more time and simply become poorer. I dont really recall how, but somehow I happened upon PTC (Pay-To-Click) sites, most notably Clixsense and Neobux, which both operate under the premise of viewing advertisements and getting paid to do so. So I registered on both sites. The way it works is that for each click (which brings up an advertisement that you have to leave open for 30 seconds), you will earn 1 penny...So by May, I imagined, I'll be able to afford a Snickers bar and a coffee. Good grief! Luckily, there's a little bit of pyramid scheming involved, too, because you can invite friends and get credited an amount for each of their clicks, too. If you didn't already recognize the imminent danger in something like that, I'll immediately warn you that I turned into something of an "overseer", cracking the proverbial whip on anyone who graciously joined beneath me, ensuring that they had clicked on their 4-6 Neobux links that day. And I'd try to convince folks to spend the $10 to become a Premium member on Clixsense for a year, so that I could get a $2 referral bonus for tormenting them. The kicker came when I learned that you don't have to settle for having friends who join Neobux under you and won't bother to click on their links for you. You can just buy new friends! Neobux will let you "rent" referrals of people who you don't even know that didn't join under anyone else, so you can earn money from their clicks. In no time I paid $5 and got myself 20 lackeys to do my bidding. I cant tell you how often I go back to check their performance, because if they wont build those widgets fast enough, by God, I'll have them replaced. That's right, REPLACED. If you see that someone isn't clicking often enough, you can "recycle" them for 8 cents, meaning you get rid of them and get someone else there who might do their job (Yes, MIGHT. It's all a gamble. Pretty exciting, actually). My rented referrals are in desperate need of a human resources department, because I've become quite a micromanaging dictator, ready to fire them at a moment's notice if they aren't supporting my bottom line. This is way too much excitement for a snickers bar and some coffee. Ah, Capitalism!

(PS: I hyperlinked those two websites up there for a reason. Hint! Hint!)